The Reflexive: Edinburgh

National Monument of Scotland

It really does feel like yesterday that I was catching a train in Glasgow to head over to Edinburgh. And now my Edinburgh experience is over and I’m sitting at a desk, in a house in Manchester. Time really does fly. Edinburgh was certainly a different experience than any other I’ve had so far.

In Edinburgh, through Workaway.com, I volunteered at a place called Barnton Bunker. It was a quarry in the early part of the 20th century. During WW2 it was used by the RAF as a fighter command operation. In the cold war years it was expanded into a central coordination facility, a nuclear bunker. The military authorities decommissioned the site in 1983 and it was badly vandalized and damaged by fire in the 1990’s. It started to be refurbished in 2011. Barnton Bunker now is part of The Barnton Bunker Preservation Society SCIO. Its aim is to turn the facility into a museum, as well as an event space. Go to the Barnton Bunker website for more history.

This leads down to the bunker

The generators, turbines and the like in this room

The phones used at the bunker

On this trip I really wanted to engage with people. I feel like in the past 10 years I’ve become more of a recluse. It got easier to just stay at home rather than go out and be with people. Or if I went out, I would just do things by myself. I'm not exactly sure why that was the case, maybe it has to do with intimacy. Maybe I’m turning into a misanthrope. Or is it that I fear death and feel it’s better to be in a quiet solitude? There is certainly value in being with oneself and enjoying that solitude but there would be many times where I wanted some sort of communion or fellowship. I wanted a connectedness. I needed a connectedness but invariably I chose not to seek it. I felt traveling and volunteering was a good way to challenge these notions, especially at a place like Barton Bunker where there would be a lot of other volunteers. The most volunteers that were present at one time while I was there was 21. Being with that many people is going to at least get you outside yourself and out of your comfort zone. I was also the oldest person there by far. There were a few others closer to my age but most of the volunteers were 20 and 21 and the rest were in their mid to late twenties. I sort of knew that would be the case. Most people that do these things are coming right out of college or at a young age. The age difference was really of no consequence other than having thoughts of, that I’m old enough to be the father of most of the people here. C'est la vie. Anyway I arrived and was ready to experience everything.

One of four goats on the hill

A cool seating area that looks upon...

...this view. Looking Northwest

On Monday mornings, we would have a volunteer meeting where we would discuss what projects needed to be done, what has been accomplished, and what volunteers, if any, would be leaving or arriving that week. There wasn't any set amount of time to volunteer. Some might stay for a week. There were a few that have been there for 2 years. I stayed for three and half weeks myself. The main focus is to refurbish the bunker, take care of the grounds and promote it as much as we can. Tasks could include, painting, carpentry, leveling the ground, maintaining a social media presence, creating content, feeding the 4 goats, 2 emus and 9 chickens as well as the general upkeep and cleaning of our living quarters. Plus a whole lot more. For most of these work-away situations, volunteers put in approximately 20 hrs of work for the week with weekends off, and that was the case here. And you usually work on your own schedule. For example, you could start your work at 8am and finish by 12 noon and have the rest of the day for yourself. It was a pretty loose schedule. After my work was done, I took a lot of trips to places with my camera, either by bus or by walking. I went places like Stockbridge, Leith and the Old Town of Edinburgh, where Edinburgh Castle is. I frequented museums, parks and coffee shops. One day I had a lovely time eating fish and chips while I looked out over Newhaven Harbour. Instead of heading out, I might just stick around the site. Barton Bunker is on Corstorphine Hill. It rises about 530 feet above sea level so there are dramatic views from the hilltop, which is shared by those 4 goats and 2 emus. There are a lot of features outside of the Barnton Bunker property like the woodland trails and Corstorphine Hill Tower, which was built in 1871. Many people jog and walk their dogs on the trails. Davidson's Mains Park, which was across the street from Corstorphine Hill, was another place to I'd walk around. It was also on the way to Tesco's supermarket.

Dean Village and The Water of Leith

Newhaven Harbour

Grassmarket-an historic market place and street in the Old Town of Edinburgh

City Centre of Edinburgh from Edinburgh Castle

I shared a room with 3 other guys. I slept on one of the top bunks in this small room. Surprisingly, the twin bed I slept in was very adequate. I usually had a good night's sleep. I would wake up super early. I would open my eyes and see daylight then see that it was only 4:45 in the morning. The light coming so early always threw me off. I usually would get up within an hour. I would go to the kitchen and lounge area, which was the common area and make breakfast and coffee. At the bunker you were responsible for your own food and meals. There were 4 refrigerators in the kitchen that were divided amongst the volunteers. There was also shelf space for pantry-like items. You used a label maker to claim your shelf. There were also a lot of communal meals made. I made my potato leek soup a few times. Also a lot of us would go to a place called “Tummies Not Trash”, a place that would collect food from supermarkets, like Tesco, that was about to expire or be thrown away and would resell it. For £3 you could fill up your shopping bag with anything available there. So when we returned, we not only had food for ourselves individually but we would get items for the communal basket, which was mostly fruits, vegetables, bread and sweets.

Goats on the hill with the setting sun

The main house (r) where I stayed. The kitchen, lounge area and bathrooms are here.

After breakfast, I was usually by myself for a few hours on the laptop working on photos or writing before people started waking up. By noon most people were up and had started their work. The main project going on while I was there was to work on the hill, which was on top of the bunker and has that beautiful view. The idea was to level the plateau they had made in order to relocate the caravans, where the volunteers lived, to there. This would open up space on the ground level. There was also a lot of clearing on the ground level that needed to be done. That included splitting rocks in order for the excavator to be able to move them. I split 3 rocks before I badly sprained my right hand on the fourth. I was using a big ass hammer drill to make 4” deep holes into the rock. I would then insert stone splitting wedges which I would hammer with a steel mallet. I would make 4 or 5 holes across the rock and after hammering all the wedges into the hole, I’d start to see a crack form and before you knew it, the rock would split. When I was drilling a hole, the bit got stuck which resulted with the drill spinning in my hand. It had a lot of torque. I was aware of this before but I think I had rested my right elbow on my thigh in order to control that. I believe for this rock, I was standing on top of it and didn’t use my thigh as leverage. Anyway it hurt like hell. I knew it wasn’t broken but it would be the end of my rock splitting duties. That would be the end of every task basically. I reported it to the person in charge of first aid. He gave me a compression bandage and I did the RICE thing and took a mess of ibuprofen. It was swollen and black and blue for about three days. That was about 3 weeks ago but only in the past few days has it felt better. It’s still only about 50%-60% and I’m doing rehab exercises. It certainly was a pain in the ass because it was my right hand. Putting on socks became very difficult. Everything was difficult. It put a damper on things. I was pissed about it. It could have been worse though. If I had broken my wrist it might possible have ended the trip.

On the plateau on the hill-Caravans will eventually live here

The main grounds of Barnton Bunker

The huge rock in the center is where my wrist met its demise

One thing I was still able to do was take photographs and press the shutter with my right index finger. I just had to remember to hold the camera with my left hand. I did a couple of photoshoots with some of the volunteers there. One before the accident and one after. The bunker is a phenomenal place for photoshoots. Even though the refurbishment of the bunker is going to be several years before it’s complete, it’s available now to be used in certain ways. Every Saturday there is a tour of the bunker that you can book online. There have also been film and photography shoots done there. And while I was there, they held their second open mic in one of the larger spaces. This space is also available to rent out right now. The idea is to promote this space as a place you can rent. There was even talk to make it a space available during the Edinburgh fringe festival, which happens every August. All the money generated from these events goes back into the bunker.

Rue, one of the volunteers at open mic

Open Mic at Barnton Bunker

Hanging out during intermission

Pizza and beer from a food truck

When I first walked through the bunker, I thought this is a great space to shoot some portraits of the volunteers. I had intended to do that anyway with the volunteers. After all, I am lugging my photo equipment halfway across the world with the purpose of photographing people I meet. I had already done a few photoshoots in my travels and this would be a fun project to take on. For the first photoshoot I had a key light in front of the volunteers and put an external flash with a red gel behind them. I was really happy with the results. There were a lot of creative people there, a lot of musicians. I got to play an accordion for the first time. The highlight of stay in Edinburgh, however, was getting involved in the 48hr Film Project.

Erin, Sam, Rob, Me and Val at The Caves getting our 48hr film assignment

Basically the 48hr Film Project is getting a group together and making a film in 48 hours. It has been around for 25 years and takes place in hundreds of cities around the world. There were about 8 people from the bunker who participated in this. Representatives from all the groups, approximately 60 in all, showed up at a club called The Caves in the old town of Edinburgh. While there you learn what genre your film will be. The groups are also presented with the 3 things that must be in all their films; a key, a character called Sandy Rose who is a waitress and a line of dialogue, “It’s not what you think”. Then you write, shoot and edit your film over the weekend. The 7 minutes or less film must be uploaded by 7:30 PM Sunday evening. Two weeks after that there is a public showing of all the films. (I was already in Manchester so I couldn’t attend) The best film in each city screens at their annual international film festival—Filmapalooza. At the awards ceremony there, they announce the Grand Champion of the Year.

Directing a scene. "Hey do this"

Our group didn’t do much on Friday night. On Saturday morning we met and pitched some ideas to each other. Then we all took some time to work on our stories. In the afternoon we chose my story, which eventually became known as “Driller Killer”. I was surprised and excited but at the same time sort of agitated because now I had to be front and center of this project. I really had planned to be on the sidelines, assisting anywhere I was needed. In the next few hours we got our cast and crew together. I started working on the shooting script. Of course we would shoot in the bunker. 2 people worked on music for the film. For The 48hr Film Project the only pre-production stuff that you’re allowed to do before you get your assignment is to get the cast and crew together and find a location. You’re not supposed to start creative work of any kind until Friday evening. We got props together and whatever lighting we could get our hands on. Guz, who would be the DP, had a friend he had recently met, who would play Sandy Rose. We started shooting at around 6:30 and finished around 1 in the morning. The shoot went off without a hitch really. We just had to shoot the ending scene some time on Sunday. Guz was also going to do the editing, but I started to do some of the grunt work editing on Sunday morning.

Val as the bartender and also one of the composers of the film score

Diego and Nuria (Sandy Rose)

Diego, Guz, Sam, Rob, Nuria and me

As a professional video editor in the past, the way I work is first get everything organized into folders, then do tasks like marry the video to the audio that was captured with a different device. Then you watch all the takes, find the best ones and slowly build up a scene. This method didn’t work here. I was taking too long. Medium shots weren’t matching with establishing shots. It didn’t help that I was editing on a laptop with a program I never used before(DaVinci Resolve) and had to deal with my stupid sprained wrist. Ugh. Eventually Guz took over editing whereupon he made magic. He really made something visually interesting and fun to go along with my script. There’s a lesson here for sure. I see my editing approach here as being very rigid, like classical music whereas Guz’s approach was more attune to jazz. It really had a flow and style. The music that accompanied the scenes really helped get a rhythm going. I think it’s important for me to remember this as I go out in the world. What ideas, thoughts etc of mine are rigid? Can I be open to something different? Can I be open to other creative processes? The last scene required two actors but one was busy and the one available had to be somewhere later. So we just shot the one we had available and shot the other one a few hours later, literally an hour before the deadline. Meanwhile I made the credits and sent all the required graphics to Guz. The edit was finished and the film was exported. Then I uploaded it to the website, with 15 minutes to spare. There were a few audio issues and some edits that will need to be fixed in the future but overall I was very pleased with turning this film in. Working on a project like this was something I definitely did not anticipate. It was truly a fun and collaborative effort. And that’s what living and working at the bunker was like.

Part of the decor at the open mic space

Red phone boxes on The Royal Mile

There were a few times however, where I was over the whole thing. My roommates were messy, my wrist was bothering me, my shoes were trashed from working in the dirt and I hated this and that. Blah blah blah. Probably anyone might feel like that in this community, dorm like setting. Or sometimes you just feel like shit. That’s when you need to go off on your own. By that Sunday night, after the film was finished, I felt completely different. I was completely at ease and truly felt a sense of gratitude. Someone was playing the guitar, others were watching TV together ( a lot of Arrested Development and Rick & Morty was watched). Another person was cooking. We finished this film together and everyone was just doing their thing. People from Mumbai, Chile, Peru, Portugal, Syria, Australia, Mexico, The US and different parts of The United Kingdom coming together. I felt happiness and definitely connectedness. This is what I had signed up for.

Here is my Edinburgh photo album.

Some of the volunteers at Barton Bunker