The Reflexive: Six Months

Papas Fish & Chips-Cleethorpes

It’s been 6 months since I got on a plane in Austin in November 2024. I’ve been to 4 countries and a host of cities. I’ve met a lot of people and have taken many photographs. I’m currently in Edinburgh in a workaway situation at Barton Bunker which is RAF Barton Quarry-Edinburgh’s Nuclear Bunker. You can read about the place here. Right now there are about 17 volunteers here from places as far away as Chile, Mumbai, Australia and of course Texas. It’s certainly interesting. And volunteering for something like this and meeting the people I have met here is one of the reasons I wanted to do this adventure in the first place. This is only my second workaway. Most of my time has been pet sitting. Since my last blog about Paris and London, way back in the beginning of April, I’ve mostly been in the Midlands, UK.

St Nicholas Church-Stevenage

Murals on Restrooms-Peterborough

The Umbrella Project in Bedford

The cities I visited in the Midlands region were Stevenage, Peterborough, Bedford, Cleethorpes, Grimsby and Lincoln. I also spent 10 days in Glasgow before I arrived here in Edinburgh, which was fabulous. At most of those places I was pet-sitting cute kitties. Peterborough and Lincoln were cities that were in between the pet-sitting cities. Lincoln was a city I was told I should visit by a former history teacher I met at Brougham Castle in Cumbria, England back in February. He said the Lincoln Cathedral was something to see. When I saw I had an extra day between Cleethorpes and Glasgow and that Lincoln was on the way. I figured I’d spend a day there. The former history teacher was right about Lincoln Cathedral. It was a pretty spectacular building as well as the surrounding area that included Lincoln Castle. You can imagine that a city that has an incredible historical landmark like Lincoln Cathedral builds up the tourism around it. Steep Hill, as the name applies, is a steep gradient that leads up the cathedral. The road actually goes back to Roman times. It now has all sorts of shops, cafe’s, bars and restaurants. I would say it has a lot of tourists milling about but it exudes charm. There were other charming places as well. There was an incident however, as I was leaving Lincoln.

Lincoln Cathedral

Steep Hill-Lincoln

Lindum Books-Lincoln

Norman the Dragon at Lincoln Castle

As I’ve written here before, when I stay at a hotel, in between pet-sits or workaways, all I really want is a clean place, reasonably priced. Sometimes that hasn’t gone so well, like the night I spent in a pod in Hackney, London. I picked the place in Lincoln because it was close to the train station and close to Lincoln Cathedral as well. It was down the block from Lincoln College. It wasn’t a proper hotel so to speak. It only had 5 rooms and the bathrooms were shared. They give me a code to a lock box for my room key. There is no staff on site there. Since my room needed a lot of cleaning, apparently there was a lot of partying in there the night before, it wasn’t ready for me to check in, so the woman in charge offered me another room. No problem except it was on the third floor which meant lugging my heavy suitcase up there. I’ve done that enough times on this trip so no matter. The room was one of the bigger rooms I’ve had so far, with the biggest TV. It even had Netflix. Plus it had a fridge, microwave and kettle. It was a clean room, reasonably priced. Since I had to check out by 10:30, my plan was to stay there till then, then walk the approximate 15 minutes to the train station and wait there for my train which was due to arrive at 11:30. My room was the only room on the 3rd floor where the shared bathroom was. There was only one other person sharing the bathroom with me and he was staying on the floor below. I was all packed, watching TV while lying on the bed waiting for 10:30. Around 10:22 the alarm went off. Since I was ready to go I figured I’ll just get my stuff and leave. When I opened my door, I saw water cascading down the stairs. What the fuck? I looked down the staircase and saw the water flowing down. The alarm was blaring and I heard people shouting. I looked towards the bathroom and saw the sink faucet was on and the sink overflowing. I quickly shut the faucet off. The woman downstairs that works in the restaurant was shouting something about did someone leaving the shower on. It was a very chaotic situation. I shouted down to the woman that someone left the faucet on and I shut it off. I went back to the room and gathered all my stuff to leave. As I went down the stairs, I saw water dripping on the 2nd floor and water dripping on the 1st floor. I don’t know if that water was coming from it cascading over the staircase or actually seeping through the floors. As I exited, a man connected to the place arrived. I got all my stuff and was outside. I saw the woman who I told about the faucet. She asked what happened and I told her again that the sink was overflowing and that I shut it off. Then she said it was only me and another person using the bathroom so it had to be one of us that left it on. I said it wasn’t me. At that point I decided it was a good idea to leave. I walked quickly to the train station. I thought, do they think I am to blame for this? Is a car going to stop beside me as I walk to the station with people inside shouting, "There he is, get him!” I made it to the train station. Later, on the train I thought, “Did I leave the faucet on? I really tried to remember but I have no clear memory of turning it off. I imagine when you’re doing mundane tasks that you do every day you don’t have memories of specific details pertaining to them. Like turning off the stove, etc. But the idea that it might have been me bothered me the rest of the day. I’m sure that the other guy at the hotel said he didn’t leave it on either. But like the lady had said, it had to be one of us. That was the most distressing thing during this whole six months. A few days later, while in Glasgow, I looked online to see if the rooms were available and they were.

Rectory Lane-Stevenage

Jade's Ice Scream Parlor-Cleethorpes

Reflections of Bedford

Bedford Railway Station

Cleethorpes Beach

Despite the flood in Lincoln, my time in the Midlands region was great. In Cleethorpes, a sea-side town, I stayed in a place along the beach and watched the sunrise on several occasions. In Bedford I attended the first Bedford Independent Film Festival, which was a great thing to happen upon. As I was watching one film “The Mill Killers”, a film I can give a thumbs up to, I realized I was sitting next to some of the women starring in the film. After the midlands cities I made my way up to Glasgow. When I write these things, I have a very particular way I want to present them. In my head I have divided them a certain way. All the previous blogs have been done that way. Originally I was just going to keep this blog and photos to my Midlands journey and the next blog would be my Scotland Journey. But I’ve since been to Glasgow, in fact I’ve already been in Edinburgh for 10 days, so why wait to write about Glasgow. It turns out Glasgow was one of my favorite places so far. I was excited to go there as it would be my first time in Scotland. I had lovely weather practically every day and did a lot of walking. It’s a very mural heavy town, which I love. Did I tell you one of my new goals is to paint a mural on some building somewhere? I went to a cool coffee shop and bakery called Outlier and had the best sandwich of my life. Isn’t that all we really want, a really good sandwich? This one was called a toastie and had cheddar, leeks and house pickle, which was more like a spread of some kind. I went there twice. If I lived in Glasgow it would be a regularly visited place. They even have a gallery in the back. Also, a friend I knew in Seattle, Jocelyn, who moved to Glasgow a few years back, showed me around some cool places like Barras Market, an indoor/outdoor weekend market that has existed in some form for over 100 years. It was loaded with weird, cool stuff. She also took me to Glasgow Necropolis, a Victorian cemetery on a hill next to Glasgow Cathedral in the east end of Glasgow. I’ve been to so many cemeteries on this trip. I really am enchanted by them. Could it be that I'm somehow metaphorically burying part of my life? Since this trip began, I’ve put a lot of thought into why I’m doing this and think about the life I gave up in Austin and my life in adulthood.

Met Tower-Glasgow

Glasgow Railway Station

Tube Walkway-Glasgow

Honey...I Shrunk the Kids Mural by Smug in Glasgow

Scottish Independence Parade-Glasgow

   In Austin, I was in a good situation. I lived in a great location on South Congress Ave. in a pretty decent apartment, although that complex is scheduled to be razed for a new development project, as far as I know, it still stands there today. I worked a lot as a stagehand/lighting tech for Local 205 at The Long Center, a performing arts venue where Ballet Austin, Austin Opera and The Austin Symphony performs. I thoroughly enjoyed my work there and the people I worked with. What's more, it was a 10 minute walk from my apartment. There were other venues where I worked frequently through local 205 that were approximately a 20 minute walk away. I liked my job, I liked the area. I like being close to Lady Bird Lake. I loved going to Bouldin Creek cafe every week with my friends. I was very comfortable. But at the same time I wanted something else. So I gave up all that to do this. I’ve had these sentiments before, of being in a comfortable situation but wanting something else. I had a very good job at Oxygen Media in NYC. It was one of my best jobs ever. In spite of that, I thought at times that I wanted to do something else. I wasn’t exactly sure what something else meant however. The show I worked at Oxygen was eventually cancelled and that ended up being the impetus that led me to Seattle in 2003. I absolutely loved my time in Seattle. While there, I had another very good job at Screaming Flea Production and eventually a lovely condo in the Fremont neighborhood. Fremont was maybe the best place I have ever lived. There’s nothing more I loved to do than get a coffee at Fremont Coffee Company and stroll The Fremont Sunday Market. In spite of that, I clearly remember thinking one day while at Screaming Flea, editing Gardening by The Yard, a gardening show on HGTV, that I’m ready for something else. You know the old saying, “Be careful what you wish for”. “Gardening by The Yard” was cancelled and after that, there were a few years that were difficult, especially financially. As a result of that, I made it down to Austin in 2016, a place I had been enamored with since my first visit way back in 2009. In both cases of moving to Seattle and Austin, even though it had been something I had wanted to do, the decisions had been dictated by external circumstances. As I’ve mentioned above, my most recent time in Austin, I was in a very desirable situation to say the least and there were no external circumstances that pushed me to start this adventure. It was just me thinking I want to do something different. Initially the “something different” was I wanted to travel for an extended period of time. I figured out how I could do it and then did it. That meant giving up that wonderful life in Austin, at least for a while. When I talk about wanting to do something else, when I was in NYC and Seattle, I'm still trying to figure out what that means. Is it a yearning, is it wanting to do something challenging? I think way before I ever thought about moving to Seattle, there were plenty of times of wanting to do “something else” but I didn’t have either the courage or even the wherewithal to do it. And I think that while it was true that I've had yearnings, I also didn’t want to do anything out of my comfort zone, much less take a big leap of faith. People who do that, who go outside their comfort zones or do something against the social norms you’ve been taught since you were young, are free spirits.
   “You have to challenge things all the time to keep yourself alive, to keep the spirit going, to keep amusing yourself” Bruce Mclean (Scottish sculptor and performance artist) All this yearning, of wanting to do something else could be just that, my subconscious trying help keep alive, to be vibrant. I saw the above quote in an art museum the other day and it really resonated with me. I also believe not every inkling to “do something different” is necessarily to drastically change my life. But I’m sure my desire to stay in a straight line, or really a fear to stray from it, informed all kinds of decisions, no matter how small or inconsequential, throughout my life. Even if I didn’t know that’s what I was doing. I know people have been philosophizing about this for millennia but I’m really just learning this about myself now, on this trip. I don't have any regrets at all about my decision even though at times I may have fear of what the future holds or of financial insecurity, but I believe everyone has those fears to some extent no matter where you are in life. No sense in letting that dictate my life. So I might as well try this thing for now and if along the way, due to fear, my thoughts recede into wanting my comfortable, safe life in Austin, Texas, so be it. The other day, here in Edinburgh, I fed some chickens, goats and emus while looking at a beautiful vista on a hilltop, while the beautiful sun shone down upon me. I also did that in the rain.
   I think that’s all for now. This may be my longest blog of the trip so far. I’ll talk more about my Edinburgh experience in a later blog as I still have a few more weeks here. After Edinburgh, I’ll be heading down to Manchester for a bit. Check out more photos below and follow these links for more photos from the Midlands, UK and Glasgow. Please check out my website POC Photo Company where you can purchase photos of mine. It helps fund my adventure plus you can have beautiful photos on your wall.